From not wanting children, to parent coach

Gosh if I went to one more mommy group and heard someone gushing, “I always dreamed about being a mother” I would puke.   If you think that would make me the worst person to guide you on your peaceful parenting journey, I totally get it. It didn’t feel good when I was in that frame of mind, I was filled with shame. If you stay with me for a bit longer, I’ll explain how I learned to shift my beliefs and how you can do the same, even if your situation isn’t exactly the same.

Don’t get me wrong, I got pregnant intentionally both times but it is not something I dreamed about and I entered into it with a lot of fear and the need to be perfect.  Though I know my parents did the best they could and they entered their own parenting journey with lots of unhealed childhood wounds, I consequently had lots of my own childhood trauma. 

My parents immigrated from Italy to Montreal, Canada, didn’t have an opportunity to go to school, worked long hours in retail jobs to make ends meet.  They did their best to provide for us financially but emotionally was not something that was accessible to them.  They were controlling and used fear-based discipline. I was committed to never becoming a parent.  I felt that since I could not parent based on what I knew, I couldn’t parent at all. 

Then I met my now husband who convinced me that I could be a nurturing, loving mamma. When I was pregnant with my oldest, now 8 years old, I did everything I could to be to the “perfect” mama.  I was exercising, eating right, taking all the prenatal supplements my naturopath recommended, and was planning a natural, unmedicated birth.  I achieved all those things, with some hiccups, but it left me with the false assumption that I could control things. 

Once my bundle of joy was brought home, I struggled from day one.  Breastfeeding was hard and my little baby cried all the time.  He was diagnosed with colic and that just sent me further into my postpartum depression.  Nothing I did would soothe him.  I felt completely helpless and it would make me angry.  Yes, angry.  I had read so many parenting books but nothing worked so I felt I was to blame.  I was a failure, I couldn’t do it. 

It felt like all the mothers in my community had things together.  So, I isolated myself.  I had no extended family for support and my husband was at work all day.  I fell further into depression but refused to accept it and get help as I felt it was a confirmation of what a failure I was. 

That was my entry into motherhood.  Though that still doesn’t answer why I am the most equipped to help you be the parent you want to be, regardless of how you were parented.

Through my many ups and downs of motherhood, all the courses I took, all the therapy I underwent, the major transformation I had only occurred when I worked with my own parenting coach.  I finally learned to shift my limiting beliefs and keep myself calm in the eye of the storm. 

My transformation had me thinking about my purpose in life.  After I had children I always felt unfulfilled at work.  I knew I wanted to work and was successful but it didn’t feel meaningful.  Through lots of self-reflection, what I came to realize is that my journey and transformation can be beneficial to other moms and dads that are trying to break the cycle of generational trauma. 

Everything I went through has been for a reason.  It has led me here. To support parents around the world so they can become the parents they want to be: less anger, frustration, guilt, and shame.  So, I enrolled in the Jai Institute for Parenting to become a Peaceful Parenting Coach and the rest is history. 

If you want support from someone who has walked in your shoes, then I’m your girl.  I have lived my own transformation of healing my inner child, I am parenting a neurodiverse, highly-sensitive child and another that is as strong-willed as they come.  In addition to my own personal experience though, my certification has equipped me with lots of proven and effective tools to guide you to achieve your parenting goals.

Are you ready to embark on your own journey? Book a free call today!